I have very weird sleeping schedules.  I have Fibromyalgia, CFS, RLS and Insomnia. You can only begin to imagine how these conditions reek havoc on my life.  From day to day, I never know how I’m going go feel, or be able to function. Often, I will stay up all night, and be able to stay up all day the next day…yes I’ll be tired, but I won’t be able to go to sleep.  Other times, I cannot keep my eyes open for love nor money.

Examples:  Last Friday night, I stayed up all night, with one of my daughters.  We spent the time talking, laughing, snacking and cleaning out and organizing one of her closets.  On Saturday, we drove up to TN, to spend the at her mother-in-laws house.  The kids swam, and we enjoyed having a cook out.  I did just fine, but was ready for bed around 10:00.  I was able to go to sleep and stay asleep all night long.  We drove back home on Sunday, and I slept almost the entire drive (about 8 hours).  I was able to go to bed and sleep both Sunday night and Monday night…BUT…I could not go to sleep on Tuesday night.  I stayed up all night, and got a lot done around the house.  I was okay for a few hours on Wednesday morning, but crashed just before noon.  Normally, I would just lay down for a couple of hours, and then try to go to bed at a normal time in the evening.  Not this time.  I slept (except to get up to go to the bathroom, and let the dogs out), until 5:00 this morning.  So what does this have to do with learning a lot?

 Early morning TV, that’s what!

In the last couple of hours, I have learned that apparently, I cannot live without a Hoover Wind Tunnel Vacuum Cleaner, Meaningful Beauty Skin Care Products, or a Lifestyle Lift Procedure.  I also need to purchase a NutriBullet, so that I can consume a NutriBlast Smoothie each day.  All of these things will dramatically change my life for the better, in 2 weeks or less. AND…I can get them for a rock bottom prices if I call and order within the next 30 minutes.  Bonuses are included from free shipping to locked in prices for refills, to free gifts just for me –  if I’m one of the first 200 people to call.  I don’t even have to pay the full price.  I can make EASY payments!

The claims have to be true, because celebs and people JUST LIKE ME, have had miraculous results! How could I not believe Cindy Crawford, Debbie Boone, Valerie Bertanellie, Brianne (from Austrailia), Pam (from Houston Texas) and some guy whose parents are MDs?

Since I’m already on the phone with my credit card clutched in my hand, I can (for just pennies a day), feed a child in Africa, provide clean water for a an entire village in a third world country, send care packages to an elderly Jewish couple in Russia, and plant trees in our National Forests.

I’m afraid that if I watch early morning TV again, my husband will have to get a second job…I think I’ll just try to sleep in!

Wow – I've Learned a LOT

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0 thoughts on “Wow – I've Learned a LOT

  1. there’s an entire channel on my Fios lineup devoted to infomercials–it’s called, get this, WOW! It showed up about 6 months ago. Seriously. Apparently, infomercials 24/7 are what I needed.

  2. I also have fibromyalgia and have difficulty sleeping. I can be so tired that I ache and will not be able to sleep a wink. Other times, I can fall asleep will at my computer or while chatting with someone. Hmmm. Hard to figure that out so it makes sense. I sometimes will watch a program on tv and fall asleep. In fact I had to watch one program 3 times in order to see the entire thing. I used to see that the lights were out at a neighbor’s house and was upset, because they had a new baby and they were all asleep! How dare they! Glad to see your sense of humor in such an annoying situation. I, too, like to laugh. I often tell our grandkids that “silly is our friend”.

  3. Thank you for the great post. It’s nice to see humor used in the face of physical adversity!

    I suffer from psoratic arthritis, reverse seasonal depression disorder and bouts of insomnia, especially during the summer. Even as a child, I had a hard time falling asleep.

    I, too, have learned a lot from those late night/early morning infomercials. I’m very glad that I usually have the will power to resist when I feel compelled to whip out my credit card… Sadly, there are a couple of stores near me that have an As Seen on TV aisle near me and I have caved when I saw the same product advertised on TV right there in front of me. I always think that I should have bought them on TV after all, since buying the same thing at the store excluded me from receiving all of the free gifts and doubling of the product the TV offer included.

    Some of those infomercial product claims are true! I’m a big fitness fanatic and have purchased a couple of things that I’ve seen advertised. The things I bought really do work and I use them pretty much every day.

    I try to stay away from the informercials, for the most part, as well as the stations devoted exclusively to shopping. Most of those things just make me feel worthless and poor and cranky. Why should I need those things to look, feel or act better? Am I not already good enough the way I am? How depressing that I can’t afford most of it, even at those low, low prices! Grrr!

    When I’m up late at night, I work on my blog, enter sweepstakes and giveaways, write my fiction, do housework, (pray for sleep) and have really old sitcoms on in the background!

  4. Wow….another whole world out there…..but know about that because hubby is retired and during the day he is captured by all those infomercials….sorry about your illness…can sympathize as I have just been diagnosed with peripheral neuropathy and am also in pain alot…medication helps but find coping and not wallowing in my condition makes me feel better….besides, I have 8 grandkids I must be involved with…they keep me busy!

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